Why Do Men Have Nipples?

Humanity is plagued with a never-ending list of unanswered questions. Like, if a tree falls in the forest but no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? Are we alone in the Universe, or do we share it with extra-terrestrial life forms? Did Leonardo DiCaprio deserve an Academy Award for his performance in The Revenant, or should the bear have gotten more credit?

Today at Healthversed, we aim to disseminate (quite possibly) the most important question of them all. Not the existence of God (though we may touch on it), or the even meaning of life. No, today we’ll attack the troubled existence of the male nipple and all of the controversy that goes along with it. Pay attention, take some notes, and most importantly, try to keep an open mind.

Science, Bro.

To begin to understand the question of the male nipple, we must start at, well… the beginning: Conception. You see, when a man loves a woman very, very much, they…

…wait, I should probably fast forward just a little bit. We all know that the sex of a baby is determined by the distribution of X and Y chromosomes. But before the sex of the baby is established, the embryos develop in the exact same way. So, technically, both male and female babies develop the mammary glands before they ever resemble men or women. Time passes and female nipples develop in to their final, biological form. And male nipples just… don’t go away.

Shestakov Dmytro / Shutterstock.com
Shestakov Dmytro / Shutterstock.com

No Nippled Male Mice

Are you sitting down? OK, good. Because what I am about to tell you might blow your mind.

There are a few strange, strange people that believe mice are more biologically advanced than humans. Why? Because their males have evolution-ed their way to a life sans-nipple.

It’s true! At some point during their long, storied history, male mice have found a way to one-up us human males on the evolution front (it has to do with a rush of testosterone in the early embryonic stages). Other male mammary-less mammals include Horses and Platypuses.

Geoffrey Lawrence / Shutterstock.com
Geoffrey Lawrence / Shutterstock.com

Third Nipples

Because, sometimes two isn’t enough. Yes… people with third nipples actually exist. And they are way more common than you’d think. Third nipples, or Supernumerary Nipples, are often mistaken for a mole or a birth mark, and can be found on as many as 1/3rd of the human population! Including some noteworthy celebs like Mark Wahlberg, Harry Styles and, of course, Chandler.

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